words by ava

This being human¹ is a guest house².

Every morning a new arrival³

A joy⁴, a depression⁵, a meanness⁶, 

Some momentary⁷ awareness comes⁸

As an unexpected visitor⁹

Welcome¹⁰ and entertain¹¹ them all!

Even if they’re a crowd¹² of sorrows, 

Who violently sweep¹³ your house

Empty of its furniture¹⁴,

Still, treat each guest honorably¹⁵,

He may be clearing you out¹⁶

For some new delights¹⁷. 

The dark thought¹⁸, the shame¹⁹, the malice²⁰

Meet them at the door laughing²¹,

And invite them in²².

Be grateful²³ for whoever comes,

Because each has been sent²⁴, 

As a guide²⁵ from beyond²⁶. 

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1.  To be or not to be? Am I alive or do I just seem to be? Infallible, susceptible to pain, imperfect—this being human
2. If unwelcome visitors bombard the doors, is a house still a haven? Safe if they can enter with no invitation?
3. Today I opened my door to find a sturdy box, neatly wrapped, cream-colored paper tied in a delicate rose bow. Its ugly secret disguised by the perfection of its facade. I stumbled face first, crumpled, returned again to slumber
4. The scent of freshly mown grass and mornings spent lounging in crisp cotton sheets
5.  Not today, not today, back to bed right away, disappear to another day
6. Crazed woman. Agitation hung around me, this anger about me
7. A fleeting minute, seemingly permanent, sinks, a weighted stone zooming to the ocean floor, never to return. Victory is theirs.
8. And with their arrival, hope, the thing with feathers, flees
9. A visit is temporary but it never seems so. The hinges of the door clamp shut sealing in time who is unwilling to hasten its withdrawal
10. Excitement, feigned, in a “Welcome!” masks “I’d rather you weren’t here”
11. Pleased to meet you sir can I get you something to drink? Here—let me take your coat.
12. Overwhelmed by the invasion, dominated
13. Hurricane season left the back deck stairs destabilized. I remain, now in shards, the cracks allow the light entry
14. Temporary structure, material possessions, loved but unnecessary
15. With kindness
16. Empty, no, refined, rejuvenated, ready, a spring clean
17. Joy, found again, unexpected. 73° sun-filled February day, as birds chatter away, singing, joy, singing joy
18. A worry; consumed by an abstract representation, a shadow of dark doubt stalks its owner 
19. Fold in on self, embarrassed, regret the words that precede and follow
20. Nails dug in, self hug, crushed, drawn back to this world
21. Oiled feathers release, like water off a duck’s back
22. To all the deviations I’ve tried to love, it hasn’t been easy
23. Gratitude expressed for the daily regularities that you learn to appreciate
24. With intention to be received
25. Led unwillingly first, softened, a now obedient follower
26. To whatever lies ahead, beyond, behind, I accept you as you are.